Birth story - Vic and baby Frank

Frank is my second baby. The birth of my first baby, Polly, was very long and difficult and I felt I lost control. I had an epidural and ventouse delivery which was the right thing to do at the time, but for my second birth I very much hoped to do it more naturally. The first time around I felt that hypnobirthing wasn't for me, but after several of my friends found it really useful I thought I'd give it a go. I really don't think I was mentally prepared for my first birth. I bought the Positive Birth Company's digital pack and really enjoyed it.

When I was 40 weeks+ 4, I was putting Polly to bed about 6:30pm and started to feel some pains in my lower back. I didn't think too much of it as I'd been having Braxton Hicks for a couple of night beforehand but nothing came of it. The surges started to get more intense over the evening and I couldn't get to sleep so took myself off to the living room about 10:30pm to watch a film and started timing my surges with the Freya app, although I was still thinking they might stop! At about 12am they were more intense and weren't going away so I woke up my partner and got him to call his parents to make the 2 hour drive to us to look after Polly. I still thought we might not be leaving for the hospital till the morning but thought it was a good idea to get them over just incase.

By the time my partner's parents arrived at 2:30am the surges were very intense and 3 in 10 minutes so we called the hospital and they said to come straight in, so my partner's Dad got straight back in the car and drove us to the hospital!! We got to the hospital at 3:15am.

I had to go to Triage initially for a check, because I was due to get antibiotics via a drip and they were busy in the birth centre. The midwife examined me and told me I was 9cm dilated!! I couldn't believe it and it was a huge relief as I thought I had so much longer to go, and was having very strong surges and had been even thinking about an epidural again. But now I knew I didn't need it. So she took me straight to the birth centre to get antibiotics there as we were running out of time! My partner couldn't come into Triage with me due to Covid so it was nice that I wasn't there for long and he could join me at the birth centre.

At the birth centre I had 2 amazing midwifes. I was hoping to go in the birth pool and I was disappointed when they told me I couldn't because they were concerned about infection due to the illness my first baby had (she was taken straight to NICU when born and was very sick). However, I didn't want to take any risks and was ready to just get on with it. I used gas and air and I also had a TENS machine on my back which definitely helped. The only position I was comfortable in was all fours, any time I had to spend on my back was really really painful! So I knelt on the bed and leaned over a huge cushion which was nice for resting on between surges.

After about an hour the midwife suggested she could break my waters. From reading/watching lots of other positive birth stories I had heard about quite a few women that had found this useful so I agreed as I thought it would be a relief, and it was! I had to get on my back for that bit which was very uncomfortable but it happened quite quickly.

I did do a lot of shouting through the surges and made a lot of noise, but I found that helped me to focus on my voice rather than the discomfort. I had done down breathing through all the first stages, but found it difficult towards the end. However, I think that because I had been able to keep so calm initially because of all of the prep I had done from the PBC online pack, it meant at the later stages I still had all the energy and power I needed and knew I could carry on.

I definitely wobbled at the transition and started telling my partner and the midwives I couldn't do it! But they all talked me back down to calm and I became aware of what was happening. I don't think I quite got the feeling I needed to push down myself, but the midwives suggested it and it felt right. I thought I wouldn't want to be coached to push, but actually the midwives gently made some suggestions such as shifting position and holding my breath whilst pushing and I actually found this really helped, so this was the right thing for me! Frank arrived at 5:23am.

It felt longer but was all over within a couple of hours of arriving at the hospital!! It was amazing to be able to hold him immediately and sit with him for a while, and watch the umbilical cord go white. With Polly I held her for about a minute before she was taken to NICU, so to be able to sit with Frank and my partner and then enjoy the time afterwards together on our own in a room in the birth centre was just fantastic. I felt amazing and like I could do anything!

I found the PBC course very very useful. Throughout labour I reminded myself of the positive birth affirmations - particularly 'My surges cannot be stronger than me because they are me' and 'Every surge brings me closer to meeting my baby.' I also did a marathon a few years ago and so I found the relaxation that told the story of the marathon brilliant and I really channelled that while in labour! Also a huge part of it was reading other birth stories and watching positive birth story vlogs on YouTube. The first time around I really had no idea what a birth looked or felt like so to be able to draw on all these experiences and know that I could do it too was key.

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