Birth story - Siobhan and baby Finnegan

*Trigger warning* - Mention of previous difficult births, use of the word contractions, postpartum haemorrhage.

I am still in awe of how incredible this birth was, and I credit so much of how positive and empowering it was to this course. While this was my third natural birth, it was my first where I felt firmly calm, capable and empowered. My oldest child’s birth at 41+3 was incredibly long, clocking in at nearly 46 hours of active labor (with back labor to boot), and by the end I felt completely exhausted both mentally and physically. My second son’s birth at 41+6 was triggered by an induction, making me feel like I got hit by a train and my body was totally out of control as I went from zero contractions to his birth in less than 5 hours. I had attempted water births with both of them, but they were unsuccessful as they both got briefly stuck in different ways. I really wanted this time to be different.

This was also my easiest and most enjoyable pregnancy, and I was really able to treasure It. I knew that Finn would most likely be our last pregnancy, and I really wanted to have more control over what that birth would look like, namely my own mindset. I decided this time to do this course (I had taken more traditional birth preparation courses in the past), and focused as much as possible in the last few months of pregnancy on my own mind. My husband Matthew and I actively practiced up breathing, down breathing and relaxation techniques that he could do in between labor. I visualized the type of birth I wanted, and spoke it into existence as much as possible. I actively worked to prepare my body for him to begin his journey in the most optimal position, prioritizing weekly prenatal chiropractic, daily stretches & exercise and Spinning Babies circuits. After we crossed 37 weeks, I also started incorporating natural labor inducers to encourage my body to birth earlier than my last 2 children. I had no idea if any of this would actually make a difference, but I knew it was worth a try.

At my due date appointment on October 27th my body showed zero indicators of being ready to go into labor. While 50% effaced, I was just 1 cm dilated. I knew from my previous birth experiences that babies come when they’re ready, so we settled in to welcome him after 41 weeks like his big brothers. Finn had other plans though! Saturday the 29th I felt a small gush of water when I stood up from our kitchen table after breakfast. We monitored it throughout the day but I didn’t seem to be actively leaking. However, I was feeling off, and we decided the best thing to do for my mental health was to take our older children to my parent’s house for the night “just in case.” Even as we dropped them off I wasn’t convinced that labor might start! Our hope was that even if he didn’t arrive, we could get one night of really good sleep before he made his arrival in the next week or so.

When we got home I did an extended Miles Circuit while my husband took care of a few things, and then Spinning Babies Three Sisters when he came back. I felt some increased discomfort, but nothing major. We made pizza, watched a movie and headed to bed early.

However, Finn had other ideas as he woke me up out of a sound sleep around 22:45 with real contractions! The contractions continued to get stronger and closer together, and I labored at home for as long as possible, using the hot shower, massage, birthing ball and TENS unit for relief. I felt strongly that we weren’t quite at the point of needing to head to the birth center, as I wasn’t feeling the consistent pressure that I knew was a more reliable indicator for my body that we were transitioning to active labor. We did call our doula and the birth center to give them a heads up though, so that when we were ready to head in they were ready too. Turns out that was the smartest move, as since there were no active births or women recovering at the time there were no staff there at that moment! Calling in advance gave the midwives and nurses a little bit of extra time to prepare to be there at any moment. I made the decision that we should try to sleep to have a little bit of extra energy.

Around 3am I was woken up be very intense contractions. I quietly got up and bounced on the yoga ball in the dark, measuring my contractions and focusing on how my body felt. Matthew woke up soon after, and he rubbed my back as I bounced. While things felt intense, I also knew I hadn’t hit active labor yet, so I crawled back into bed. I felt this overwhelming urge to quickly get out of bed, and within 2 steps my water completely broke all over the bedroom floor around 3:40am! So we got in the car and headed to the birth center, as the waves started coming in a super strong way soon after.

When we arrived around 4:20am our doula had beaten us there, but the birth center staff hadn’t arrived yet! I briefly labored in the front seat of our car until their team arrived, praying this baby didn’t speed up as this was a new car! Luckily their team arrived just a few minutes later, and I was in the birth tub by 4:30am.

Matthew had been prepared to get in there too, but this time the birth tub in the room was significantly smaller than last time. So instead, he sat behind me with my doula to my side, rubbing my back and shoulders and giving me a hand to squeeze as hard as I needed to.

I labored actively for about an hour, changing positions frequently to help encourage him to be in the most optimal position as he made his way out. I focused on my breathing, counting through the surges and trying to stay as present as possible. It became increasingly harder, as the surges were coming about every 30 seconds and I was barely having time to recover.

Before I knew it, he was close enough for me to feel his head! I pushed for just 15 minutes before he was crowning. At this point the midwife cautioned me to slow down a little bit and focus on how I was pushing, to help reduce my risk of tearing. I was shocked that I was able to focus in that way, but I shifted to try to push in a very measured way. First his head came, then his shoulders and they told me to reach down and grab him. As I pulled him up to my chest, I was in shock. I couldn’t believe I had gotten the water birth I had dreamed of!

Finn was born at 6am on the dot on October 30th, after only about an hour and a half of labor at the birth center. He was absolutely perfect, weighing in at 7 pounds 8 ounces and measuring 20 inches long with a head of dark brown hair. I felt exhausted but amazing and so empowered.

The only thing bit that wasn't positive is that I experienced a pretty severe postpartum hemorrhage after. Luckily the birth center team was amazing and they were able to get it under control, but I wasn’t able to have the postpartum recovery that we had hoped for. However, even with that, it was the most incredible, beautiful birth experience. I’m still shocked that so many things I had focused on came true:

· I wanted him to be born in October, and on a weekend.

· I wanted my body to go into labor naturally before 41 weeks, and to have a successful water birth.

· I wanted to feel empowered and in control of my birth experience, and not tear or have complications that would require a hospital transfer.

We are so in love with our sweet guy, and his brothers adore him. We feel incredibly blessed and I’m so grateful that I finally got the kind of birth experience I had dreamed of! Thank you for making such a wonderful course that helped me make that dream a reality.

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