Birth story - Emma and baby boy

Our baby wasn’t planned so when I found out I was pregnant I dived in to research and find out as much as I could about pregnancy and what to expect. I’ve always been one of those people who feels better when they have an overload of knowledge about something before undertaking the task. Unfortunately the places I researched, (Google and talking to family and friends), didn’t do much to help me not feel overwhelmed and fearful about labour. My husband found me crying on more than one occasion with my IPad in my hands and someone’s traumatic delivery story open on the screen. So finding out about the Positive Birth Company when I was around 20 weeks was an absolute god send! I binge watched the videos and then watched them again with my husband. Everything made so much sense and seemed so uncomplicated. I soon became excited for labour and babbled to anyone who would listen about oxytocin and how our bodies are made for this.

I had a really uncomplicated start to the pregnancy and luckily had an amazing OB GYN who made me feel at ease. At 28 weeks found out I had Gestational Diabetes and my OB GYN told me there would be a higher chance of being induced and it was unlikely she would let me go to 40 weeks. Thanks to the pack I was able to stay positive and not feel anxious. I had weekly check ups after 32 weeks especially because my sugar levels were getting higher and we soon found out that baby’s abdominal growth was slowing down quite drastically. I went in for a scan on Tuesday 9th July and my OB GYN asked if I would be ok to be induced that night! My husband and I used BRAIN and decided to go ahead. I had a bit of a wobble that night from the shock when I was in the shower at home but used my positive affirmations to calm myself down.

We went to the hospital at 6am on Wednesday morning and after some initial monitoring I had the pessary inserted. It was a slightly uncomfortable experience but manageable. The rest of the day I relaxed in my labour room, listened to my positive affirmations mp3, ate breakfast and lunch and watched a film with my husband. Luckily we were mostly left alone apart from when nurses would come to check baby’s heartbeat. I felt calm and in control. Around 3pm a doctor came in to check my progress and do a vaginal exam. This time it was extremely uncomfortable but my husband was able to use UP breathing to get me through it. Around 6pm I started to feel some very mild surges and was excited! My husband put the LED candles around the room, sprayed the limoncello room spray and put on the spa music. We were ready to get the show started!

The shifts had changed and at 8:30ish a new doctor came in to do another vaginal exam to check progress. This part was the only negative blip on my whole labour experience. This doctor practically attacked my vagina and despite me shouting STOP 3 times she didn’t. I had clenched up from the pain and ended up having a full panic attack and almost fainted. That doctor was then offended by me telling her to get off and my husband telling her to stop so stormed out slamming the door! Luckily the new night midwife was amazing and familiar with hypnobirthing. Alongside my husband she encouraged UP breathing and used positive language to calm me down. By now I refused to have any more exams and didn’t want anyone touching me down there. The panic attack also lead me to want an early epidural before any more examinations. My midwife managed to convince me to let her break my waters and insert the catheter which I agreed to because I trusted her. The horrible doctor returned an hour later and stated that she was now going to break my waters (no asking, just stating!). I knew that if I let her I would have had a breakdown and I wasn’t going to let her ruin my entire labour experience. Before the digital pack I would have NEVER had the confidence to say no to a doctor but Siobhan’s voice echoed in my head and I said “actually no I would prefer it if my midwife did it”. Offended again, she stormed out and my midwife and husband Hi 5 ed me and we had a little giggle. (I did end up writing a complaint about the doctor to the hospital).

After the epidural my labour experience was a dream. Getting an epidural wasn’t on my birth plan however, in the moment I knew I wanted one and I’m so glad I did. My surges had been manageable with UP breathing but the constant vaginal exams were ruining my labour experience and I needed the epidural to get me through them. I managed to get a good few hours of sleep and at 2am I was 1cm dilated. I went back to sleep and at 3am was checked again to find out I was 2cm dilated. After a few hours I was at 4cm and then by 9:30am I had jumped straight to 8cm. I could feel mild surges through the epidural which proved to so helpful when I was pushing! After a while my original OB GYN came and announced it was time to start pushing. Although I would have loved to feel my body transition and the natural urge to push, I knew I wouldn’t be able to do with the epidural. However I didn’t mind the guided pushing and pushing was actually my favourite part of labour. I re-live it in my head all the time, I honestly loved it! It was an intimate moment with dim lights and only positive language. My doctor, the mid wife and my husband all worked together and were so encouraging and positive while I was pushing. We even had a few laughs and jokes! I was able to breathe my baby boy out and only had a small minor tear. My doctor even commented on how calm I was and how positive the room felt.

Baby boy was born healthy at 2.8kgs and has grown much faster on the outside rather than in! He’s now 3 weeks and we are all doing well. I am so grateful that I stumbled upon the Positive Birth Company on Instagram and incredibly thankful to Siobhan and the videos. My mindset and experience wouldn’t have been the same without it.

Key ways the digital pack helped me:

Empowered me to say no to medical authority figures when something didn’t feel right (I would never have been able to do this before)

Gave me the knowledge to understand what was happening to my body and what to expect with an induction. The science videos were my favourite.

UP breathing was a lifesaver. Best technique and a life skill I think!

My husband was truly incredible at supporting me. When I first told him about the pack his response was “I don’t want to do a weird hypnotising thing” and now he’s recommended the pack to our pregnant friends. He says he felt helpful and useful and knew what he could do to support me.

The birth plan template was so useful to make me stop and really consider my options (even though my plan went out of the window!)

BRAIN acronym