Birth story - Emz and baby Isaac

I am a very anxious person and when I got pregnant this didn't change! Every movement, sensation I'd worry something was wrong!!

I looked into hypnobirthing and came across the digital pack and decided it was something I definitely wanted to try :)

Watching the videos really made me understand birth better, managing expectations and I'd say the most important thing I learnt was it's my body, my baby and my birth. This resonated within me and made me feel so powerful, that actually I did have choices, as previously I'd just thought I'd have to go along with whatever the doctors said.

I had been deemed as low risk at the beginning of my pregnancy, so decided I'd opt for a water birth in the midwife led unit at hospital. A week after my 'due date' I was deemed high risk by the consultant, so would have to go to the delivery suite. This was difficult to hear and i did have a wobble but I used my BRAIN and my husband helped bring me back to green. I could do this!

I used my BRAIN and accepted this decision but asked for things to be put into place to help me have the birth I wanted. It was agreed that I could have as low risk birth as possible on the high risk unit.

I wanted to try and avoid an induction, so agreed to a sweep at the visit to the consultant to try and help me start naturally. This was on the Friday.

My labour started around 1am Sunday morning and surges were around 20 minutes apart. A hot water bottle and up breathing kept me calm and focussed. I listened to the positive affirmations a lot and kept telling myself that I was safe and my baby was safe. The surges got more frequent, but then died off again. I tried a warm bath, but this wasn't for me, it just made me feel uncomfortable, so had to get out. I went with it and tried to stay focussed. My husband helped me stay on green, as a few times I felt I couldn't cope anymore and felt I was losing control. The hospital didn't want me in till my surges were 3mins apart, lasting for at least a minute for an hour!! I never got to this stage.

It got to Tuesday night and I decided that the pain was getting too much for me to manage at home with the tens machine, so I called the hospital and asked to go in for an examination and the possibility of pain relief. They agreed, so we headed to the hospital.

I accepted an examination, as wanted to see how things were progressing... I was 3cms dilated, but the hospital agreed to keep me in overnight, to give me some diamorphine and get me a nights sleep. I did manage some sleep that night but the diamorphine really knocked me out the following day and in honesty weds was a bit of a blur!

My surges were still very irregular but I kept with it and breathed through each one with the help of my husband and the tens machine. The hospital tried to send me home Wednesday but as I stood up my waters went! No going home for me! I was pleased about this as I felt things were progressing and I wanted to be near the delivery unit.

As my surges were still irregular the midwife wanted to move me to a ward to sit out my labour till I was over 4cms and in active labour. I said I didn't really want to move from where I was and I'm not sure if it was the thought of change, or whether my body was on the brink anyway, but I started to have cluster contractions with literally no breaks in between... was very intense. It was at this stage I was offered some gas and air and I did accept. It helped me focus on my breathing better and did ease the pain a little too. Another midwife came on shift and examined me... I was 6cms. I knew deep down I had progressed as things were feeling different.

I was moved to the delivery suite around 7pm Wednesday night and after discussions with a midwife and my husband, I decided I wanted an epidural. My body was so exhausted from 3 days of surges and I just needed some sleep to help me prepare to birth my baby. The epidural wasn't done till around 2.30am as they'd had emergencies in theatre. Those 7 hours were very intense and again I had a wobble as felt I just couldn't do it any more!! Again my husband refocussed me and encouraged me to breath and focus. It was at this point I was also put on a syntocin drip as I hadn't moved from 6cms in 4 hours.

Once the epidural was in, I slept till around 7am. I accepted another examination and was fully dilated :-) I was left for 2 more hours to allow babies head to descend but those 2 hours flew by! I felt so excited that I was that close to meeting my baby! I kept positive affirmations in my head, especially my birth partner is by my side and on my side and also my baby is the perfect size for my body. These helped me stay focussed on my end goal.

At 9.15am I started pushing. I'd not pressed my epidural for a while so I was able to feel my surges and the pressure of where I needed to push. I was pushing for about an hour but bubs heart rate was decreasing with surges and he wasn't quite coming round the bend properly. It was discussed that I may need some help to deliver my son if he wasn't out by 10.45am. I asked questions and used my BRAIN and decided to accept the help, as wanted my son out and healthy. There was also a risk of me bleeding, so I needed to accept help.

With the help of forceps, an episiotomy and my determination to get bubs out my son was born at 11.13am on the 1st November weighing in at 8lb 15oz. He was placed straight on my chest and it was the most amazing feeling I've ever had in my life!! I haemmoraged at this point and my son was given to my husband. The doctor who had done my forceps delivery activated the haemmorage protocol and lots of doctors came in. I was scared at this point as so many doctors came in. I was aware I was bleeding as I was being injected with various meds and things being put through my IV line to get my placenta out and to try and get my uterus to contract back down. My midwife was AMAZING and reassured me that it was ok and they send everyone in, so they can see who they need and send out the rest. They were so calm throughout and managed to get my placenta out and get the bleeding under control. I kept breathing and focussing on my son.

I was kept in hospital for 2 days to monitor me due to the blood loss but this was positive as I got so much help perfecting my breast feeding latch.

Although the birth I had was nothing like I'd planned I feel it was a positive experience and the tools I learnt through the digital course really helped me get through things.

Thank you